Behind Guarded Eyes
by MissGlobal22
Summary: As much as he needed her, she needed him. And behind her guarded eyes, there was pain only he could understand. Spock/OC
1. Concerns and Observations

Chapter One

Concerns and Observations

"Morning, Captain."

"You can call me Jim, lieutenant."

"If it's all the same to you, Jim, I'd rather just stick with Captain."

Captain Jim Kirk shrugged. "You'd better get to your station."

Lieutenant Olivia Fasura seemed to prefer being impassive and stubborn. She could make someone laugh if she needed to, and she was a very good lieutenant, but even so, she was not always the person someone looked to for comic relief.

A certain pointy-eared commander chose that point to enter the bridge from the turbolift.

"Morning, Mr. Spock," Olivia greeted him, not looking up from her work.

"Good morning."

Quite a while passed until Olivia said anything more.

"Captain, I haven't received any data. May I be relieved?" Lieutenant Fasura asked Jim.

"What in hell for?" He looked at her quizzically.

"I'm not feeling particularly well, sir."

"Well, go see Bones. Chekov, take over her station for now," Kirk ordered.

"Aye, Captain."

* * *

Spock had noticed that Olivia was looking ill before anyone else had. Her usually guarded gray eyes were soft. Her strong and independent demeanor seemed weakened, and she no longer held herself with, in Spock's terms, logic and reasoning.

He was continuing on at his station when she had asked to be relieved.

"Are you alright, lieutenant?" Spock inquired.

"Ah, yes, just a little thing with my head..." As if to make a point, she rubbed her forehead.

"Explain."

"I've been having headaches off and on, sensitivity to light, and other symptoms."

The Vulcan raised an eyebrow. "Perhaps I may be of assistance?" he offered.

"No, it's okay. I should head down to the sick bay..." Olivia trailed off. "I'll see you later, Commander Spock."

"Yes, of course."

He watched her go. As he turned back to his work, he realized that Jim was looking at him.

"How sweet," the Captain said in a mocking tone. He laughed. "Nice job, Spock."

Spock raised a slanted eyebrow once again. "I hardly think that was an affectionate exchange."

"Do you know how fun it is to mess with you?"

* * *

"Get some rest, Olivia. If things get worse, just notify me. Got it?" McCoy ordered, finishing the examination.

"Yep. Thanks, Bones," she replied simply.

Lieutenant Fasura started toward her quarters, ready to follow doctor's orders and get some rest for once, but she stumbled into none other than Spock.

"Excuse me, sir," Olivia apologized.

"It is alright. It was an accident. I trust you will be well soon?" he asked, cocking his head just slightly to the side.

Olivia paused for a moment. This was most unlike the Vulcan. Sure, they engaged in friendly conversation from time to time, but he had never gone out of his way to check on her.

"Yes...McCoy just told me to get some rest."

"Very good. I will let you be on your way now," Spock said. He stepped aside to let her pass.

"Thank you for your concern, commander," Olivia acknowledged softly, beginning to walk away.

Spock observed her retreating form. He was becoming more concerned about her lately, though he thought perhaps it was because they were becoming closer friends.

Deep down, he regretted letting her leave.

* * *

**Okay, so this is my first Star Trek fic, and I apologize if it's not great. Review!**


	2. Surprises

Chapter Two

Surprises

Olivia did not want to show up for her shift, which was surprising. She was always on time and prepared for duty. Today, though, her head felt as if it would burst, and she stumbled backwards onto the floor as she tried to get ready.

"Ow."

Olivia sat there for a moment. Would it be so bad if she took the day off? It would only be to rest. Only to do as McCoy told her. Something at the back of her mind was nagging at her, screaming at her to go to work, but she felt so comfortable lying limp on the floor...

No, Lieutenant Fasura had to go. She stood. Her mind ached as she got into uniform and stepped out the door.

* * *

Spock noted that Olivia did not greet him or the captain as she usually did everyday. Nor did she sit erectly in her chair, but rather slumped over her station. Jim seemed to notice this, too. He shot Spock a look that said, '_What do you know about this?_'

The Vulcan turned to Olivia. "Are you well, lieutenant?"

"I assure you that I am perfectly fine."

"You are lying," he stated with an eyebrow raised.

"I am not lying if that is my opinion, sir," she shot back.

Spock did not continue the conversation after that. He began battling his human emotions; anger that she would lie to him about being ill, slight regret that he could not help her. Suddenly, he was interrupted. The Enterprise rocked violently.

"Keptin! Ve are under attack. It's ze Klingons, sir," Chekov announced.

Spock tuned out for a second. He observed Olivia, who was now perking up a bit at the word 'attack'.

"...Zey are attempting to board ze ship, sir."

Everyone began to scramble to take control of the situation. In the midst of the chaos, Spock reached Lieutenant Fasura. He made her face him.

"Olivia, you must listen to me. You are not fit for duty," the tall Vulcan told her.

"Commander, I-"

"I cannot risk your safety. You must promise me you will hide and stay unharmed until we regain command of the ship."

"I...I promise," she said softly, searching his face.

"I will see you soon."

* * *

_I cannot risk your safety._

Did he truly care that much about her? Or was it just a friend protecting a friend in an intense situation? Whatever the case, Olivia was doing as she was told. Her brain raced with ideas for potential hiding spots.

The sick bay?

Perhaps down in Engineering?

Or maybe just her own quarters?

Without any logical conclusion, she picked Engineering and began to head there. The halls were nearly empty except for the occasional person jogging to the bridge.

_Almost there._

An arm swung out and grabbed her by the throat. Maybe people were running that way for a reason other than just getting to the bridge.

_Oh, shit._

"Look what I caught...An officer of Starfleet," growled a Klingon.

"Shall we kill her now?" came the voice of a second.

"No...I wish for her to suffer."

"Y-you...let...me...g-go!" Olivia gasped out.

"She wants to be tough, does she?" the second Klingon snarled.

A new voice broke in. "I advise that you let the woman go if you are one to value your life."

Then, everything happened quickly. The Klingon attempted to crush her, shots were fired, and Olivia Fasura's world went dark.


	3. Something Else

Chapter Three

Something Else

Spock thought for sure that Olivia was going to die. After killing the two Klingons, he scooped her up in his arms.

What if he lost her? What would he do then?

"Olivia?" he whispered. "Please. You must live."

He rushed to the medical bay, where he spotted McCoy and Jim talking. They immediately took notice of the commander and Olivia.

"Spock, what the hell-?" Dr. McCoy began.

"Doctor, I must ask for you to withhold any inquiries until the lieutenant is in a stable condition," Spock said sternly.

"Whatever. But either give her to me or help lay her down on a bed."

Spock easily, but carefully, laid Olivia down on one of the biobeds.

"Spock, I want to talk to you," Jim ordered authoritatively. He pulled the tall male aside. "What happened back there?"

"The Klingons attempted to kill her. _I _attempted to save her life, yet I fear I may have been too late." Spock's gaze drifted over to where McCoy was scanning the lieutenant's body with a tricorder.

"Do you know what she was doing?"

"She was following my orders."

"Great," Kirk muttered sarcastically. Deciding to change the subject, the captain continued, "We're almost back in control of the ship. I don't suppose you want to come help me out?"

"No, I believe I may be able to assist Dr. McCoy," Spock proposed.

"Whatever, you pointy-eared bastard." Jim clapped him on the back and walked out.

The Vulcan approached the doctor now. "May I be of assistance?"

"The best thing you can do right now is get out. She's got broken ribs, internal bleeding...It's not good," Bones explained.

Spock glanced at Olivia. Her face looked so vulnerable, so innocent in such a broken state...

"Of course, doctor."

* * *

Spock stood, waiting, outside the room. Approximately two hours and fifty-seven minutes had passed. He turned to a nurse, who informed him that McCoy _wanted_ him to see Olivia.

_Fascinating._

Hands clasped tightly behind his back, Spock made his way to Lieutenant Fasura's bed. McCoy was there analyzing something on his tricorder.

"Doctor?"

"Oh, Spock. I thought you'd want to see something before she wakes up." Bones pulled Olivia's hair back, revealing a pointed ear. Green bruises were beginning to form on her neck. "She's Vulcan."

Spock's hands dropped to his sides. He didn't know what to do. How had he never noticed Olivia's hair cut was designed to hide her ears? How had he missed the characteristics?

The lieutenant began to stir just as McCoy exited. Her eyes flickered open, landing on Spock's face.

"Why did you not inform me that you were Vulcan?" he asked gently.

"At the time, it wasn't logical for me to do so." Olivia reached to feel the bruises on her neck and winced. "Thank you. For saving my life."

"You are welcome."

"Why did you order me to hide?"

Spock paused. He was a bit confused about his own actions. "I do not know."

"Tell me when you do..." Olivia sighed. "I'm so tired, Spock," she murmured.

"Rest, then."

The lieutenant's eyes cosed. Spock stood, watching her breathing slow as she began to sleep. Suddenly, an idea came to him. He tentatively put a hand on her temple.

Spock was inside Olivia's mind. He began to search through her current emotions, which were stashed away in a corner of her subconscious. He saw her worry, pain, and fear. Spock immediately replaced them with calm and relief. Quickly, he pulled his fingers away from her face.

He had seen something else there. Affection. Admiration. Love.

For _him_.

* * *

**Oh, snap. Anyway, I was thinking of a possible Pon Farr scene in the future...What do you think? Review!**


	4. See You

Chapter Four

See You

Olivia noticed that Spock was avoiding her. Ever since he had visited her in the medical bay, the male Vulcan became distant. She ignored for the most part, because if she'd focused on it intently, it would have interfered with her work ethic. Olivia hadn't acknowledged the fact that Spock was doing such things for a while until crossing paths with him on her way to the bridge.

"Hello, Commander Spock," she greeted him.

He simply nodded and was on his way.

"Spock?" she called.

Spock turned back to look at her, replying, "Yes, lieutenant?"

"You've been acting strangely."

"What makes you think so?" He raised a delicate eyebrow.

"You're trying to avoid me." Olivia's emotions threatened to bubble to the surface.

"Lieutenant, I am only avoiding you-"

"Is there any valid reason for someone to avoid their very good friend for days on end?"

Spock furrowed his brow and held her chin so that she would look him in the eye. "I believe there is. I am only avoiding you so that I do not do something I regret." He then dropped his hand down, told her goodbye, and walked away.

* * *

Spock was a little angry at himself for acting so irrationally toward Olivia's feelings for him. He wasn't sure what to say, or do, or feel. Did he reciprocate the feelings? Or was he surprised and trying to find a way to let her down carefully? Not even he himself knew.

He had decided the logical thing to do was to avoid her so that he could sort out his emotions.

That backfired.

Now, Spock sat meditating in his quarters. He could not stop thinking back to Olivia's concerned, sad eyes. More and more of her emotions had been slipping through her guarded eyes. Was it because of Spock?

Questions clouded his mind, obscuring his logic. Only emotions mattered now. He wanted to speak to Olivia. To truly know her. To understand.

And for hours he pondered what to do, until he finally thought of something.

* * *

"You look frustrated."

"Captain, that's none of your concern," Olivia replied.

"Aw, but I gotta be concerned about you, pretty little Livvy!" Jim put on a puppy dog face.

"Are you coming on to me?"

The turbolift came to a halt and Olivia stepped out, Kirk trailing her.

"Why don't you laugh more, Livvy?" he asked.

"I don't feel like it."

"Lighten up! Hey, what do you say about going for a drink tonight with me and some others?" Jim suggested.

"Not like a date or any thing, right?" Olivia said, looking genuinely interested.

"Right. Hey, do you dare me to get Spock to come?"

The lieutenant smirked for the first time in a long time. "Sure."

* * *

"Jim, do you have a good reason for interrupting my meditation?" Spock said, annoyed.

"I have an order for you," Kirk explained. "I order you to go for a drink with me and the crew tonight."

The captain knew Spock couldn't resist an order, but still the Vulcan was reluctant.

"I must inform you now that I will not partake in the consumption of alcoholic beverages, but I will meet with you."

"Fine. I'll see you then." Jim walked happily out of the Vulcan's quarters, grinning like a mad man. This was gonna be fun.

* * *

**There's a slight chance I may not be able to update for a few days, because I'm going on vacation to Florida! Now, Pon Farr or no Pon Farr? Keep on voting, guys!**


	5. No Shit, Mister Spock

Chapter Five

No Shit, Mister Spock

Olivia was drunk. Normally, she wouldn't have had more than one small beer, but Jim was a bad influence. She was a relatively nice drunk. She sat and watched quietly as the others interacted, but mostly she watched for Spock. He hadn't shown up yet.

The female Vulcan frowned as she got up from her chair, stumbled, and fell. Olivia groaned. She attempted to push herself back onto her feet, but failed to do so. The alcohol was starting to get to her.

Olivia could hear a muffled voice call her name until darkness took her.

* * *

Spock had not expected to find Olivia quite inebriated. He had entered the room to see her sprawled about the floor. He sighed, hoisting her to her feet easily, only to see that she had passed out.

"Wake up, Olivia," Spock murmured in her ear.

Her eyes flitted open. She began to slur, "Spock...I need to see...Spock..."

"Olivia, I believe it is proper that I assist you." He began to half carry, half drag her to the door.

Jim walked over, flashing a smile. "Hey, Spock. Getting all handsy with her already?"

"I am not getting 'handsy' with the lieutenant. She is inebriated, so I thought that I might assist her," he explained.

"Yeah, sure. Where are you going?"

"I am going to accompany her to her quarters."

"Good luck," Kirk laughed.

Spock raised an eyebrow, then continued on. After finally making his way into Olivia's room, he laid her gently on her bed.

"Spock..." she mumbled.

He stood rigidly next to her, hands clasped behind his back. "I am here, Olivia."

"I feel...sick..." Alcohol was not agreeing with her Vulcan physiology. A wave of nausea hit her, and she gave a dry heave.

Spock carefully carried her from her bed to the bathroom. Olivia vomited into the toilet for a minute, then collapsed. The tall male bent down and brushed the hair out of her face. He once again picked her up and placed her back on her bed, where he sat next to her. He would watch over her until morning.

"Good night," Spock said softly.

* * *

Olivia woke to find Spock sitting by the door. His head leaned against it, eyes closed.

"Commander Spock?" she called.

His eyes immediately snapped open. "Olivia? Do you require assistance?"

"No, I'm fine. I just do not remember why you are in my quarters."

"You were exceedingly drunk last night, so I found it fitting that I watch over you," Spock explained as he stood.

"Thank you," Olivia said.

"There is no need for thanks, but it is appreciated. I must be going now, or I will be late for my shift."

* * *

"You were gone the whole night with Olivia, Spock. What's up?" Jim smirked.

"If you are implying that I had sexual relations with the lieutenant, you are mistaken," Spock replied, trying to mask his annoyance.

The captain laughed and turned back to his duties, Spock turning back to his own. He could not focus. He never seemed to be able to do so anymore. What if he was...No. Spock would not allow himself to focus on that possibility.

_Olivia..._

_Olivia..._

This was most illogical. He could not stop thinking of her. Now, she was entering the bridge, momentarily capturing his attention.

"Spock, stop gawking and get back to work," Kirk ordered.

Spock raised both eyebrows in disbelief at his actions. He lowered his gaze. "Please excuse me. I believe I am experiencing an illogical emotional reaction to Lieutenant Fasura."

"No shit, Mister Spock."

* * *

**Drunk Olivia and emotionally compromised Spock make for an interesting chapter. Review!**


	6. Short But Sweet

Chapter Six

Short But Sweet

As soon as she was relieved, Olivia went to find Spock. She needed to thank him - properly - for what he had done for her. Olivia found him just about to enter the turbolift.

"Commander Spock?" she called.

He stopped. "Yes, Lieutenant Fasura?"

She approached him, beginning her thanks, "I appreciate the many things you have done for me, Spock. You truly never have had to-"

"Olivia, may I ask a personal inquiry?" he interjected.

"Yes."

"What of your feelings for me?"

Olivia became very quiet. "Sir, I...I cannot lie. I do feel somewhat of an attraction to you."

"I must admit that I reciprocate," Spock said softly.

The lieutenant's eyes widened. Seeing this, the male Vulcan thought it right to explain.

"I performed a mind meld on you after your incident with the Klingons. In doing so, I saw your affection for me. I have decided that I do return the emotions, no matter how illogical they may be."

"Sometimes logic does not exist in these situations."

There was only a tiny bit of space left between them now.

"I was so afraid to lose you, all those days ago," Spock whispered. "It has been my pleasure to care for you, no matter what the situation."

And suddenly the gap was closed. Olivia didn't know who initiated the kiss, but their lips moved so perfectly together that it was as if they had rehearsed it a thousand times over. Spock's hand found its way to her neck. His other hand tightened around her waist. Soon, the kiss was broken.

"I will be there, t'hy'la, should you ever need me," he said. He brushed a hand over her cheek. "I must be going."

So there Olivia stood, speechless, as first officer Spock entered the turbolift.

* * *

**I'm sorry that this chapter is so short! I needed to keep the updates flowing smoothly! It was short but sweet, though, hence the name. The whole time I was writing this, the fan girl side of me just wanted to scream at my computer, "WHY DIDN'T YOU GUYS JUST KISS IN CHAPTER ONE?!" Is anybody else with me on this?**


	7. Author's Note

I have noticed that a lot more people are following my story! So I decided I should update you all on why I haven't been uploading any new chapters. Basically, between life and school, I don't have any time to write anymore! I promise you that I will try to keep going with this, even if the newer chapters are short.

Reviews mean the world to me! They motivate me to continue this!

Thank you!


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